Thursday, June 3, 2010

Thanks for your concern... but I'm not biting.

One of my dogs passed away very unexpectedly on Tuesday. I had planned to write a post on him, but haven't gotten to it yet. At this point, I probably won't get to it, because if I don't do these things right away, I never do. To say it was all very shocking and upsetting is a definite understatement.

Anyway, on Tuesday, I changed my profile picture on Facebook to a picture of me and Puppy that was taken almost three years ago. Suddenly tonight, I received a message on FB from H asking me if I got a new dog. This was completely out of the blue, since I haven't heard from him in over two weeks. I don't understand how he even saw my picture unless he was searching for me, since I'm not on his friends list after the incident three weeks ago. Anyway, I replied and told him that no, it was an old picture and that Puppy had died this week. He replied back to send his condolences and acknowledge how I must be feeling. At that point, I was left wondering, "Do I reply to say thanks?" The polite side of me felt like I should, but my gut said, "Just leave it be." A moment later I noticed that his profile picture had changed... instead of being a picture of him and his ex (who I can only guess had become his girlfriend again after I was tossed aside... most likely the reason I was tossed aside) it was a picture of only him. Suddenly I had his words running through my head. "When guys find themselves alone, they go back to what they know. They go back to mama." Not sure if that's what might have been going on or not, but I wasn't biting. I sent a quick IM to XH for his advice (yeah, I know, I never thought I'd see the day that he would be giving me that sort of advice!) and he agreed that I should LEAVE IT. *snicker* And that's what I did. I made a choice and I feel good about it.

I don't think I want him in my life like that anymore. He's been in my thoughts less and less over the past couple of weeks. I'd be willing to be his friend but I've been wondering if perhaps he simply can't have a female friend. You know the type?

There *is* something better out there for me. Someone who doesn't crave (and create!) the drama. Someone that I don't always have to be on guard with. Someone who accepts me the way I am. Perhaps it's just around the corner? Maybe. Maybe not. Hopefully...

2 comments:

The Original Princess said...

Sorry to hear about your Pup.

Things will work out for you. Sometimes it takes time and other times it sneaks up and takes you totally by surprise. :)

Independent Chick said...

I was very shocked to read the news of the passing of one of your fur babies. Very sorry.

As for better....it is out there!!! And you deserve it soooooo much. Patience my dear friend. Meet the three-eyed fish. Learn what you DON'T want and then when you least expect it, "that" person will appear and you will be that much more ready to accept them and how good they will treat you.

hugs!