Saturday, October 9, 2010

Just when I write you off for good...

This morning H crossed my mind. I realized that I'm no longer sitting here wondering if he'll message or call. It was an odd feeling, but I knew that I was on the right path.
Then about half an hour ago, my phone gave me a double buzz. One to tell me that a FB message had been received, and a second to notify me that I had received an email telling me about the FB message. Then it did the same thing again. I grabbed my phone to see who it was from. It honestly never crossed my mind that they might have been from H. So, I'm sure you can guess who the two messages were from.

He claims he's in the process of shutting down his FB account and that I shouldn't read into the deletion. Whatever. Most people just shut down their accounts, they don't delete their friends first, nor do they continue to use those accounts to send messages to people. So yeah, I'm not buying it.

Funny that he won't just tell me the truth. Well, I guess it's not that funny, since I know what he's like. But I just don't understand. Why all the deception? Although I don't like the truth, the truth would earn my respect far more than the obvious lies. Does he think I'm that stupid? Is he just trying to stay on my good side for another couple of weeks until he can close this chapter of his life?

He said in his message that he met a friend of mine at work recently, and mentioned to her that he was my friend and that he recognized her name from his friendship with me. Maybe I'm just a networking tool? Fredericton is a small place after all... the more people you know, the more "products" you can sell?

Anyway, I'm not replying. It's hard not to, but I'm not. I'm practically sitting on my hands right now. (Which is why I'm babbling here... better to write here than to further engage him.) I figure he didn't ask any questions, so I'm not being rude by not replying. Yes, I know people will tell me not to worry about being rude, but I do. I made a promise to be his friend, regardless of the promises he has broken, I can't be intentionally rude. But I do need to take a step back right now. Which is what I'm doing.

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