...since my last post. Wow.
So much has happened. I'm now a mom. I had a wonderful pregnancy. No real problems until my due date when my blood pressure went up and I ended up being induced the following day as my liver was beginning to fail (according to the bloodwork.) On May 15 at 6:07 am, I gave birth to a beautiful baby boy.
Life is very different now, but now that he's almost three and a half months old I'm getting enough sleep (he's slept through the night several times now, but isn't doing it every night), and we seem to have a bit of a routine nailed down. (Thankfully!) The Old Girl and Fluffy are even getting to hang out with us upstairs some during the day! (BB still hasn't met Crazy Bitch or Puppy yet.) Breastfeeding came very naturally for both of us, again, thankfully!, as I was determined that he would be breastfeed exclusively.
It's funny how my outlook on so many things have changed since his arrival. I originally said I wanted to breastfeed for at least six months. Then it became eight months. Then a year (as I learned more and more about the benefits of breastfeeding.) After he arrived, I decided that I'd like to breastfeed for as long as he wants to by letting him initiate the weaning process. I'm okay with nursing a toddler. There are so many benefits. Another thing, is that I had every intention of returning to work. Not so much now. I'm trying to come up with a way to stay home with BB. I do NOT want someone else raising my child. No one will give him the love and affection that I will. And because of that love that I feel for him, I will do everything to give him as many opportunities to learn about his world as possible. At this point, the only option I can really come up with is babysitting other people's kids. I'm not sure how I'm feeling about that idea. It would take away from my time with BB, but he does need socialization as well. I'm definitely keeping that option open. I'm sure I'll write more about that at a later date.
Another interesting thing is that while I was pregnant, my mother-in-law suggested (jokingly) that she might get a trailer and live in our backyard for the summer. At the time, I thought it was a great idea. She could babysit, and I could go off gallivanting during "my year off." Heh. How wrong I was. I hate the idea of leaving my little man with anyone. I'm fiercely protective of him. Fiercely. I never expected this.
I've also become very resentful of people's comments and suggestions. I'm going to raise this little guy the way I feel is best. Don't act surprised when you ask, "Is he taking a soother yet?" and I snap, "No, he doesn't want one, and I don't want him to have one!" I don't enjoy it when people assume that my baby should have a soother. Oh, and by the way, the correct response to my reply is NOT, "I'm sure if you put some sugar-water on one, he'd take it." Didn't I just say that I don't want him to take one? Another question that I'm tired of receiving, "Do you have enough milk?" He's growing isn't he? Another one I hate, "Have you given him any bottles of water?" Why would I? He DRINKS breast-milk. He's properly hydrated. Why would I risk reducing my milk supply by giving him water when his thirst is quenched every time he latches on? Oh, and please don't suggest to me that I might want to supplement with formula at some point. I don't, and I won't. Why would I want to start pumping chemicals into my baby at such an early age. I know it works for other parents, but it's not happening under my roof. The questions and suggestions about the soothers, the water, and the formula make me nervous to leave him with anyone. These sorts of questions and suggestions make me worry that someone looking after him is going to try to slip him a sugar-water coated pacifier or give him a bottle of water. As a result, I feel like I can't trust anyone other than myself and Hubby. Hmmm... perhaps I should have created a new post with my rants? I could go on for a while I think.
Aside from the rant, I really am happy being a mommy. And I'd love to have a second child. But I don't think that's going to be in the cards, considering how close I was to not getting to have this one. So for now, I'm going to enjoy what I have, and enjoy my time with him. But he's growing so fast... I'm afraid I'm going to blink and he'll be all grown up!
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