Thursday, August 19, 2010

Take your hippo and shove it

Oh Telus Telus Telus. You have become a curse word in my life. I used to think your ads with the cute animals were so great. H and I used to laugh like fools at the hippos, comparing them to the fat chicks that would message him from the pond. But now... well, I've fallen out of love with you. Your cutesy animals are a front for your shoddy customer service.
  • The new iPhone was released on July 30. Perfect. The day before my birthday! Happy birthday to me! Unfortunately, I wasn't able to wait in line for a phone that morning, and they were (obviously) sold out by the time I was able to visit the Telus store that evening.
  • My first stop that night was Telus @ the mall. Not one Telus employee would speak to me. Seriously. How did I find out that they were sold out? A (much pushier) customer interrupted one of the Telus employees, and I eavesdropped on their conversation.
  • I then headed to the new Telus location on Prospect. Although I had to wait for two rather lengthy transactions to be completed by the two employees working, at least one of them was willing to talk to me once she was done with her customer. Marg gave me her email address and told me to email her first thing the following Tuesday (it was a long weekend) and she said she would let me know when they were getting another order of the phones in. She told me that they couldn't hold one for me, but that if I knew when they were arriving, I should be able to get there quickly enough to snag one.
  • In the meantime, someone (XH?) suggested that I just order my phone from the Telus website. Great idea! No waiting in line! No frantic trips to town with the babies! Sweet! Just my luck though, none were available on the website.
  • The morning of August 3, the Telus website still did not have any available.
  • By the afternoon of August 3, they were available! I tried (repeatedly) to order one, but every time the transaction would not complete. XH explained that their website was probably using the same system as their stores, and that the stores were most likely taking first priority in the system. He suggested I try again later in the evening. Still no luck.
  • First thing in the morning on Wednesday, August 4 I managed to place my order. I was happy happy happy! The confirmation email that I received at 08:06 said, "Your order will be shipped within 3 to 5 business days. Prior to shipping, TELUS performs a credit check or credit card verification. Should additional information be required, we will email you. Otherwise, you will receive another email containing your tracking number when your order is shipped." Three to five business days. I can live with that! At the most, it should have been in my hands by the following Wednesday (August 11.)
  • On August 6, Telus charged my Visa account for the cost of the phone.
  • At 13:11 on August 9, I received an email from Amir, "Web Channel Administrator", at saying, "Please contact us during business hours (9am-9pm Eastern, Monday to Friday) to confirm your date of birth. Please do not provide this personal information by email." I picked up the phone and called the 1-866 number included in Amir's signature. The lady I spoke with seemed very confused about why I was calling. It could have been the language difference. I could barely understand what she was saying. I replied to Amir's email at 15:58 of the same day to advise that I had called to provide the requested information, but that the agent seemed confused. I did not receive a response from my new friend, Amir.
  • By August 13 I had not received the email with the shipping confirmation. I called the 1-866 number in the original order confirmation email from August 4. I once again spoke with someone I could barely understand. He continually put me on hold while he "looked at my account." At one point he came back onto the line and informed me that they said the phone would be shipped in three to five business days, and that weekends are not considered to be business days. At this point I started to lose my temper. Seriously? Jesus Christ. I HAD NO IDEA THAT WEEKEND DAYS ARE NOT CONSIDERED TO BE BUSINESS DAYS. So let me do the math here... Wednesday, Thursday, Friday, Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday... That's eight days. Eight. And I didn't include Saturday OR Sunday there. How is that possibly three to five days? This guy didn't answer my questions or shed any light on my situation.
  • At this point (13:43) I replied to the original confirmation email I received from on August 4. I pointed out that their email said the phone would be shipped in 3-5 days, but that I had not yet received confirmation of it being shipped.
  • At 15:52 Telus replied and said, "Please contact us at 1-866-488-2709 during business hours (9-5, Monday to Friday) to confirm your date of birth. Please do not provide this personal information by email." Once again, I called. I waited on hold for over 20 minutes. The lady I spoke with (I could understand this person) kept putting me on hold. Then she asked for my phone number so she could call me back in case we disconnected. (Huh?) And then she put me on hold again. Finally, she returned and told me their system was down, and that she'd call me back in five minutes. I asked, "Are you really going to call me back? I've been on hold to talk to someone for a very long time, and I don't want to have to do this again." She assured me that yes, she would call me back. Then thanked me for my call and told me to have a nice evening. Yeah... It's obvious that she didn't call me back.
  • After waiting 45 minutes, I called them again. I explained my situation to the person I spoke with (I could understand this guy too!) He seemed outraged on my behalf and said he would transfer me someone with Web Orders who would be able to help me. My heart sank when he said this, since I had been getting no where with this bunch of bozos.
  • He transferred me to someone who spoke worse English than all of the previous agents. She asked me to confirm my birthdate for the hundredth time. After repeatedly putting me on hold, she assured me that my phone would be shipped sometime during the week of August 16. I asked her if this is how they normally treat their customers. She tried to explain to me that there are many employees, and that she is only one of them. I said, "No, is this how Telus as a company treats their customers?" I couldn't understand her response. I asked her for her name. I couldn't understand it. I asked her to spell it for me. She tried several times, and between her line cutting out and her accent, I never did get her name. I asked if I could please speak with her supervisor. She told me that she would email her supervisor, and that I could call back in one business day to speak with the supervisor. WTF? Great.
  • Now it is almost a week later, and I still have not received a shipping confirmation. But Telus has my money. Assholes. I am so not impressed. Are the next three years going to be filled with this insanity?
To add insult to injury, Marg from Telus called yesterday to tell me that they now have the phones at the store. I should have just waited.

Time to head to bed. I'm not taking the time to proof this one. I need to be on my best game because tomorrow I fight with Telus again. Hopefully this doesn't become my Friday routine.


The Original Princess said...

Call Visa and see if you can cancel/be reimbursed for the transaction. Telus charged your card and, so far, you have no evidence of a product being shipped to you anytime soon. The beauty of credit card transactions is that you are pretty much protected if the company you purchase from doesn't deliver. Call Visa and stick it to the Telus Man!

cuddles said...

Good thinking! It never occurred to me to do something like that. Luckily, all is fine now. I just finished up the conclusion to my tale - and lucky for me, this one actually has a happy ending! :)

(Although I would still like to stick it to the Telus Man!)